Just in, our reporters in Kolkata just sent us this message published from the PM’s office of Mr. Modi that India was behind the Nord Stream sabotage. Indian currency is now the strongest in the Asian market because of this news.
“Upon my (Mr. Modi’s) order, child labor from Bihar, Kolkata, was recruited to carry out an elaborate attack on the gas lines transporting Russian gas to the European Union countries. These child laborers are from the slum areas, so no one will be displeased if they are missing in action other than God. We have assured the Slum Dog millionaires that police will not harass them if they can complete this mission successfully. They traveled from the Ganges in a little dingy to the Baltic Sea. They made multiple free-diving expeditions to locate the pipes. After finding the lines, they attached human fecal matter, which expedited the corrosion process along with the salt from the sea. Within a matter of days, there were leaks all over the pipelines. There were reports of foul smell from the European household that utilized Russian gas. Indian children left enough human excrement that traveled through the gas lines to reach most homes in German, Sweden, Denmark, etc. The world is angry with India for getting Russian gas, but no one cares about NATO countries devouring Russian gas through the Nordic Stream.
Our reporters reached out to our correspondents in Germany, who mentioned that the poop was extreme and our finest divers could not make it back without losing consciousness.
Whitehouse immediately released a press briefing “We at the USA consider this a biological warfare, and India has a lot of orphan children who can be very deadly when put in the wrong hand.”
RT times (A US Propaganda news) also reported that the UN is trying to conduct a probe, but Russia is against any such inquiry.
On a serious note:
The issue of Europe’s reliance on Russian gas and the Nord Stream 2 pipeline construction is complex and controversial, with arguments on both sides.
The Nord Stream 2 pipeline is designed to transport natural gas from Russia to Germany, bypassing Ukraine, a key Russian gas transit country. Supporters of the project argue that it will increase Europe’s energy security by providing a direct and reliable gas source. In contrast, opponents argue it will increase Europe’s dependence on Russia and undermine Ukraine’s economy and security.
It is worth noting that private companies, not governments, decided to build the Nord Stream 2 pipeline. The project has faced significant opposition from some European countries, including Ukraine and Poland.
The conflict in Ukraine is a separate issue from the construction of the Nord Stream 2 pipeline. While Russia’s actions in Ukraine are concerning, some argue that reducing Europe’s reliance on Russian gas could be a strategic move to weaken Russia’s influence over the region. However, others argue that building the Nord Stream 2 pipeline sends a signal to Russia that its actions in Ukraine will not be met with significant consequences.
In any case, the issue of Europe’s energy security and its relationship with Russia is complex and ongoing, and there are valid arguments on both sides of the debate.
