The union for National “Astronuts” of America demanded that they need better access to adult diaper and butt rash cream formulated for adults. The union is calling for strike and total shutdown of all rocket science until the dear rear situation is not resolved.
It is known astronauts spends significant amount of time in space and due to lack of access to restroom they are compelled to defecate and urinate in their spacesuit. NASA was providing the adult diapers but due to a recent budget cut, these life saving poop saver were eliminated from standard issued gears. NASA spokesperson agent Molder said ” Hey Elon Musk space X has instructed all Astronauts to poo and pee in a Walmart bag that they have to carry with them to space and just toss it out the exit chamber. Look how successful they have been”.
When Elon Musk was asked about tossing poop in space his response was “Look I am leaving less carbon footprint with my Tesla cars so I can leave some unwanted carbon poop print in the space to balance it out. I never said I was perfect”.
Also in the news, Buzz Aldrin one of the first people to step on the moon (controversially) has remarried at the age of 93 to a Mormon girl of undisclosed age. The moon landing was controversial as conspiracy theorist from Russia has always maintained that the landing was done in a Hollywood studio.
Neil Armstrong was also present at the wedding and he said to the reporters “The moonwalking made us all crazy, I mean I heard Moslem call for prayer in space and now Aldy marries a barely legal girl, the government still will not accept the fact that we came across Aliens in the moon..hell if I care..”.
